Giving Responsibility to Children in Kids Church

Recently I took a calculated risk during Kids Church. I ceded some element of control of a puppet show to four children. I asked them to do an improvisational puppet show. I explained to them that they were to provide the words for the puppets and the motions and make it up on the spot. Their eyes got wide. I don’t think they were sure they could pull it off at first. I gave them a simple scenario. Each of their puppets was to share one thing it planned to do this summer, plus one specific way in which it intended to serve God. I let them practice for several minutes before I brought in the other children, and then it was show time. And what a show it was. I stood next to the stage just in case they needed some prompting or assistance, but my precautions became moot in short order. They thrived.

They came up with a choreographed skit which looked and felt better than any previous puppet show we have attempted. They had fun, the audience thought it was hilarious, and they all got the point. Summer can be fun, especially when we choose to serve God.

Why not provide these kinds of opportunities for children who desperately want to try their hand at performance in a way that honors the Lord?  I put my trust in them, and they showed they were up to the responsibility.

Fishers of Men

Jesus said, “Come with me. I will make you fishers of men.” After a puppet show put on by four students in PowerClub Kids, I asked all of the children last night, “What does ‘I will make you fishers of men’ mean?” One child said, “It means he wanted to take them fishing.” Several others nodded yes. Another child said, “It means he wanted them to fish for men.”

“Okay, but what does it mean to fish for men?” I replied. They thought. And they thought. “It’s kinda like fishing for fish!” a boy chimed in.

“You mean they got out their nets, and they threw them into the Sea of Galilee, and instead of hauling in fish, they brought in people?”

Giggling and smiles and heads shaking no.

A seven year-old girl smiled widely and raised her hand.

“Yes?”

“It means that God wants us to help people know him, and to teach them how to help others know him, too.”

The class held its breath, waiting for some sign of my response. I looked into her beautiful eyes. And I smiled. I thanked her for her response. I marvelled at her attentiveness which helped her to understand the big idea of the story.

But I was most touched that this was her first time ever in church. Imagine that. She is living the lesson she helped me to teach.

The Difference Between Choices and Mistakes

If I pick up a rock and then accidently drop it dangerously close to a friend’s foot, that is a mistake. If I pick up a rock and throw it at my friend’s foot, that is a choice, albeit a very bad choice.

Moral of this post? Don’t call choices mistakes. We will all be better off remembering the difference, and we will also be better able to teach our children right from wrong.

music to my ears

The other day I tagged several friends for a note I posted on facebook. The note requested that they relate memories from the past which we shared together. Several of my friends were once in my children’s ministry years ago. As they began to post their responses, I quickly noted a theme. Most of them identified specific songs we had all sung during their time in the children’s ministry. Although a few were simply silly, most have lyrics glorifying the Lord. This was music to my ears. Although they likely cannot recall much of what I spoke during class time. They do remember what they experienced, both musically and in terms of hands-on learning experiences. I look forward to continued reports of how these and many other children were impacted for Jesus Christ through shared experiences during their most impressionable years.

Involving Children in Worship and Learning

Today in the children’s worship hour we celebrated Jesus with dance, song, movement, puppets, prayer and play. We maintained a fast pace, alternating between the elements in a way that engaged their interest. The result was a celebratory atmosphere which glorified Jesus. For children, there is no distinction between play, teaching, prayer, and song time, especially if they all engage the senses and involve the kids with direct participation. Why model passivity when they retain content and apply it much more readily by being involved in the process?

Bribing Students to Get Good Grades

Greg Toppo, writer for USATODAY provides a report about how many public schools around the USA are bribing their students with cash incentives to get good grades. As his article title so succinctly puts it, Good Grades Pay Off Literally. This topic has been discussed occasionally in the children’s ministry circles. Granted, I am not aware of any churches who give cash rewards to children for memorizing. Or do they? Do store bucks with fake money to win real prizes count? A recent article was written by Larry Shallenberger in the July/August, 2007 edition of Children’s Ministry Magazine. The article is appropriately entitled, “Stickers & Candies & Stars—Oh My!”

Personally, I don’t mind occasionally offering incentives to children. I have never been one to make it a regular weekly practice, however. We have seasons where we will have a quarter-long build up of winning points for a store night. What about you? Any current thoughts on the topic?

"What Would You Do?" Children’s Bible Study Series

I am in the process of writing a new children’s church Bible study series for the kids in my church. It is called, “What Would You Do?” We are working chronologically through the biblical text using key stories–some well known, others less so–to illustrate choices which biblical people faced in their settings, and then applying them to today in ways with which they can identify.

Last week we watched Adam and Eve encounter the serpent in the Garden of Eden as portrayed in the form of a puppet show. All of the children wanted a chance to handle the puppets so we took turns and told the story several times. Adam and Eve were faced with a choice of unimaginable proportions. I wonder. Did they know the extent of the consequences for their choice? If not originally, then later? When I asked the children what Eve should do when the serpent tempted her to eat of the fruit from the tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, they unanimously cried out, “Run away!” It is easy to make that judgement from the relative safety of several thousand years and a better understanding of the consequences of their choice. But surely we also would have been beguiled had we been in their situation. I don’t know about you, my kind readers, but I have an inkling of the deceitfulness of my own heart, the struggle I face to make good choices of a much smaller magnitude. Or are they smaller in magnitude?

This week we saw Cain and Abel (in puppet form) bring their sacrifices to God. Cain displeased God with his offering. Abel pleased God and thus experienced God’s favor. Cain then became angry to the point of bitterness. As God inquired about this, Cain hardened his heart and then began to plot against Abel, carrying out a plan to murder him. He plotted against his brother. Surely, Adam and Eve must have felt the weight of this in their hearts. When God looked for Abel he inquired again of Cain. Cain’s response rings through the ages to this day. We see it in governmental policies around the world, including the USA. We see it played out in homes, in communities, in churches, on the streets and in the public square. “Am I my brother’s keeper?” This is the inaugural moment of verbally expressed individualism. It smacks of arrogant rebellion. It was a public act of defiance against God and against another human being. Note its utter contradiction of what later would become known as the two greatest commandments to love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength, and your neighbor as yourself.

When I asked the kids today what Cain should do when he learned his sacrifice did not please God, they suggested that he should learn from this wrong choice. Perhaps he could have brought a better sacrifice at the next opportunity. Yet, as they soon learned, Cain spiraled into a series of disastrous choices. This question sparked a fascinating discussion between the kids. Why did Cain make this choice? Why did he not apologize and make things right? Why did Cain get so angry at his brother Abel and God? This then allowed us to make application here and now in our lives.

I reminded the children that I have seen a lot of kids come and go over the years. Some have grown up and have kids of their own. I know of at least one from my previous church who spent time in prison. Others also have made extremely bad choices. With all the love and compassion I could muster, I told them to be mindful of their choices now, because it sets the tone for their choices in the days to come when the choices will become much harder and more serious.

What I love about the Bible is that it does not pull punches. It is not a book of fairytales as some would have us believe. It tells it like it is. Life is portrayed as unvarnished with all its difficult contradictory problems. It is real. And the Bible shows us life as it really is. I find this comforting and helpful as I lead children and adults in the discovery process of finding out what God has to say to us in the biblical text.

The value of a well-timed surprise

It takes a lot to surprise me. And tonight I truly was stunned. A friend visited me from out of state. We began a great conversation until suddenly a second friend, from a different state, made a surprise appearance, leaving me slack jawed and speechless.

When is the last time you have experienced a surprise so stunning that you were left speechless and in awe? What might it take in the children’s ministry context to provide a unique experience so stunning that it is forever imprinted on the memories of the children for the sake of the gospel of Jesus Christ? By stunning I do not necessarily mean large, expensive, loud, or even technologically innovative. It might be one or more of those, to be sure. Or, it might simply be something so simple in its delivery, but profound in its application, that each child is left clamoring for more. For me, it was the unexpected appearance of a second friend whom I love dearly. For our kids it could be any number of things. A grandpa who visits their class. An athlete who visits an event. A community that bands together to help remodel their broken down home, especially their room. A senior pastor who gets on the floor with them to listen to them talk about their world on their terms. A school teacher who visits their sunday school class and meets their sunday school teacher. And the list goes on with endless possibilities.

I will not soon forget this night. Yet, I will soon begin planning simple, but meaningful ways to touch the hearts of the kids in my care.

Hands-on Learning Personally Experienced

Last week I traveled to Eastern Washington to visit some friends. It was a wonderful time of fellowship. It also provided some surprises. One of these was a new interest introduced to me by David. Wood carving. It is not something I ever aspired or expected to do. I have long admired his handiwork via photos. He does the carving and his wife Pati paints them. It is really quite remarkable, especially when I see the finished work in person.

So, on my second day there, later in the afternoon, he invited me downstairs into his basement to learn how to carve. It was with a mixture of uncertainty that I followed him down the steep, narrow staircase. Molly, their dog who is pictured in the photo, kept a watchful eye on me as I descended. This was her domain. I was an intruder. More on that in a moment.

I found a small cozy well lit room with a television playing Animal Planet. Molly likes to watch the show, especially when it is about dogs. She barks, whines and scratches at the TV, much like a person interacting with their favorite show, only with more personality. Finally, David placed a chew toy in her mouth to act as a kind of mute like what you would place in a horn. It worked!

I sat down in a chair and David showed me a few key cuts and strokes. First there was the stop cut from which material would be chiseled to create a greater relief effect. And then, of course, the actual chiseling. I was not so sure I could do this. I spent my entire life believing I am not a craft-enabled talent. The jury is still out, I am sure. This stems in part from wanting to settle for nothing less than perfection. It’s the old saying, “If you can’t do something right the first time, then don’t do it at all.” I took it to heart. It is a dreadful teaching that needs to be unlearned. It caused me to forego many opportunities over the years, not only in terms of art, but in other areas of life as well, because of this frame of mind which I continue to work to overcome.

Yet here I found myself doing something far beyond what I would ordinarily try. And I enjoyed it. I enjoyed the conversation especially. But David made it easy to learn the skill. He made it understandable. Doable. Safe. And affirming. So, I tried. And curiously enough, with his guidance and initial prompting by drawing the facial outline, a visage appeared on the walking stick which I was carving. Eyes. Nose. Mouth. David carved the beard, himself. I plan to try one on my own because I think I can do it. He built into me enough confidence to try again on my own. He invested hands-on guidance to prompt me toward actions I would never have attempted on my own initiative. Then it occurred to me. This is what hands-on learning is all about. No abstract theory on the principles of wielding cutlery, administering safety precations and first aid, or choosing the wood of appropriate species and shape. None of that. Well, maybe a little on safety. But you see my point. He removed obstacles which otherwise would have intimidated me and he immediately immersed me in the learning experience tangibly. Yes, I made minor mistakes, but he was present to help me overcome them. He created a situation in which I was inspired to purchase a limited amount of materials to continue practicing and learning.

When I asked David why he had me practicing on a beautiful walking stick rather than a simple board, he smiled and said it was okay. I later found out why. He gave me the walking stick for my hiking which I also enjoy. I was deeply touched at his generosity. Both he and Pati made a difference in my life that weekend with their gift of hospitality and their generous gift of friendship. Molly proved the comic relief by barking at me with her tail wagging and her fangs bared everytime I stood up, but begging for me to give her food when we were at the dinner table. :)

This experience causes me to raise the question: Just how important is hands-on learning to the process of causing our children to learn and apply biblical truth?

Disillusioned Christians: Implications for Educational Ministries in the Church

Recently a person contacted the IRC website of which I am a part. He had some pretty angry things to say about God, Christians, and Christianity. Typically, I would simply ignore that kind of unprovoked rhetoric, but I decided to reply, just to see if there was any possibility for conversation. I told him I would be praying for him and I asked him why he is so angry. He explained to me that he had spent much time in the church and in youth groups, but that he realized his experiences fell short of giving him the answers he desired when he finally actually read the Bible for himself. Those of us who are church leaders would do well to listen to the heart of people who give complaints like his, rather than get hung up by any errors of fact or biblical misunderstanding on their part, not to mention the provocative challenges to our faith. Indeed, I have continued the dialogue with him with additional emails in the hope of removing some of his barriers to understanding the text and the potential of leading him to faith in Christ.

The words in quotations below retain his style of writing and his choice of spelling, including all typos, so that you can gain an accurate sense of his tone and content.

He says, “I then thought, perhaps it would be a good idea to read the bible, instead of just blindly accepting everything my minister said and accepting the verses and psalms read in church.” In other words, he was not necessarily taught how to read the Bible for himself with even the most basic interpretive skills. So when he did read it, he was not prepared for the experience, specially given his apparent angry temperament.

He goes on to say, “What i found disgusted me beyond anything I could ever imagin. Homophobea, canabalism, womens rights injustices, religious intolerance, absurdity, human
sacrifice, animal sacrifice, rape, amputation…. And nobody has been able to answer my questions as to why these exsist in the bible and are usually brought forth by God himself, who is sapposed to be all powerful and all knowing, I can’t find an intelligent religious person to answer any of my questions, all I find everywhere I go is blind conformity. Nobody thinks for themselves, and the
religion we now call christianity and not christianity at all, its a modern day socially acceptable state of believe in which people identify with only becuase if they identified with something else they would be labeled as such.” He is not the first person to point out these issues. In fact, I find myself wondering if he has been influenced by the vocal and evangelistic breed of new atheists who have been making waves with their books in recent years.

Again, I did exchange a few more emails with him; enough to help him realize I was not trying to give token responses, but that I was engaged with the real concerns he is raising. He actually toned down his rhetoric toward me, which I took to be a sign of warming relations.

Having written all of that, imagine this type of scenario being played out in the hearts and minds of Christian young people in our churches all over the USA and in other parts of the developed world. It is happening with alarming frequency. I often to talk to people about these very issues. Why is that? Why are young people experiencing crises of faith after having spent most of their lives in the church, worshipping with their families?

Based on the comments above, here are a few general suggestions to consider. They are in no way directed to any specific church. They are intended to prod all of us just a bit:

1. Eventually, young people are going to begin thinking for themselves. I maintain we should help them learn that process, as developmentally appropriate, in their growing up years, rather than telling them what to think and constantly spoon feeding them information in the form of the standard Bible stories, songs, verses and of course, standards of church conduct. Either way, there will come a time when they are going to evaluate the merits of what they have long been taught in the church with the skills, or the lack thereof, at their disposal. Why would we not engage them increasingly with inductive skills in the biblical text even as they are beginning to learn to read and throughout their elementary years into middle school and high school? Why do we take the so-called easy road of Christian moralisms with little or no biblical context, and then expect them to get it by the time they graduate? Is it any wonder they become disillusioned when faced with the harsh realities of life’s real narratives as they head out on their own?

2. Why are so many Christians afraid to engage someone like this in honest discussion about the issues he raises? I suspect it is because they realize they are ill-equipped to attempt such an endeavor, and so they resort to the standard responses full of church jargon and appeals to piety, rather than doing the hard work of having a real conversation. What frustrates many people like this isn’t that Christians don’t know all the technical answers. It is that so many of them do not even attempt to become conversant with their own Bibles. To be fair, he is just now reading the Bible for himself. But isn’t it reasonable to expect that people who are pastors and teachers, not to mention mature Christians, should be at least modestly equipped to engage the text?

3. I think sometimes we have to look past the provocative rhetoric of people in crises of faith into the hearts of brokenness which spew it out. The words they say might offend, but they really can’t do much to hurt us. However, given the opportunity, the words we say in reply hold the potential to speak into their hearts if we do so with the leading of the Holy Spirit, and with thoughtful biblical authenticity which is bathed in the compassion of Jesus.

4. This issue is not a passing fad. It has been with us for a long while and will continue to grow exponentially as people leave our churches in search for a spirituality or life experiences which seems real to them. Some will be vocal about it, as my interlocuter has been via email. Others will leave quietly. I wonder…. Do we notice their departure? What implications does this have for the way we do community in the church context? Churches that help people connect authentically and which provide consistent opportunities for engaging the biblical text will, in my view, grow biblically grounded and relationally connected disciples. They need not be mutually exclusive concerns. I suggest checking out Barna’s research on this. I don’t agree with some of his conclusions about the church and its future, but I do think he is on to something about the disillusionment of many.

5. I agree with my friends at Group publishing wholeheartedly in saying that Bible learning needs to be R.E.A.L. That is to say, it needs to be Relational. Experiential. Application Oriented. Learner-based. Contrary to the accusations of some competing publisher’s representatives, this does not imply that learners cannot be engaged in-depth with the biblical text. I honestly think that a genuine partnership between the home and the church which provides for cooperative R.E.A.L. learning will instill in children and their families the best possible preparation for lifelong discipleship. There will still be challenges along the way, but the accusations of not even being exposed to reading the Bible should never be one of them.